
[The following is from the fourth installment in Lloyd Douglas’s series, “Wanted—A Congregation!” in the summer and fall of 1920. This installment, dated 9/2/1920, is titled, “Fourth Phase—The Service of Worship.” The series is about the Reverend D. Preston Blue, who is on a campaign to enlarge his congregation. This episode takes place after he has begun to succeed in building his audience. Douglas explains why it is necessary for latecomers not to be admitted during the ritualistic part of the service.]
“It is entirely unnecessary that there should be a steady tramp, tramp, tramp down the aisles during this impressive moment. The public does not value Christianity the more highly for being permitted to treat a church service with less respect than it is obliged to manifest in a playhouse. Therein lies one of the chief difficulties with the Protestant churches of America. They have consistently believed and practiced a series of logical fallacies with reference to the public mind.
“They have lacked the wisdom to understand that people are not especially attracted to any institution which they are permitted to treat disrespectfully. Not infrequently during the organ prelude, ‘dear old Brother Smithers’ snuggles up beside ‘dear old Major Welickedem’ and chatters audibly, to the annoyance of everybody within a range of fifty yards. Where else but in a Protestant church would such an absolutely unnecessary disturbance be tolerated? Not in the theater, surely. Nor at a concert. And why must the church put up with such annoyances? Oh, because it has consistently permitted almost any sort of a nuisance to nullify whatever opportunities were presented for an orderly, inspirational service of worship! But – someone exclaims – what is one to do? One must go to dear old Brother Smithers and tell him to cut it out. It can be said gently, tactfully, purringly – but it should be said. If the dear old fellow becomes incensed and withdraws to some other church, it will be a great deal better for his own soul than if he stayed where he was and habitually made a nuisance of himself. For, in church Number Two, he will not talk during the service, remembering what had happened at Number One.
“There must be no crying babies, shrieking all through the otherwise impressive moments of the service! Nowhere else but in a Protestant church would such an annoyance be permitted for a moment! What shall we do? We must tell the young mother that she is to be excused from her church duties until her baby is old enough to be placed in the church kindergarten where all small children are to be during the church service.
“You wonder why some of the finest, most earnest, most philanthropic people in your town are not in church on Sundays? Provide a service that appeals to the heart and is uninterrupted by petty annoyances which destroy every possibility for a reverential worship, and let it be known that you mean to have such a service every Sunday – and you may notice a change!
“No, sir; when the time comes in the service where silence is the order, close the doors, shut off the tramp of the tardy and the chatter of the thoughtless, and have silence!
“If some belated brother and his wife become offended because they are obliged to wait a few minutes in the vestibule, that is sufficient proof that the church, with its old way of doing things, hasn’t done very much for their souls, and it is high time something was tried! And if they get so angry they resolve never to come back, and go away and tell it all over the lot that they went to their dear old church, where their dear old fathers and mothers had been wont to come straggling down the aisle almost any time between ten-forty-three and eleven-thirty-five, and, bless you, weren’t permitted to go to their own seat just because their fool preacher had suddenly developed a crazy notion that the doors were to be closed through the opening service – well – what of that? Is that going to put the church out of business? Indeed, it is the very choicest advertising. No church would be able to purchase or devise a finer publicity medium than about half a dozen loquacious ex-members who had gone forth to spread the report that their church had gone in for a strict practice of reverence. Such a campaign is sure to bring out a select lot of splendid souls who will come next Sunday to see if, perchance, there is that something in your service for which they had sought, eagerly and in vain.”
[In my next post, I’ll tell you about Douglas’s fifth and final article in the series, “Wanted – A Congregation.”]








